I Will Remember You
by zippersful
Summary: Ephram visits New York , and for the same reason as the last time: a funeral. Second chap added: She leaves a dream for him.
1. Will You Remember Me

  


I Will Remember You

_I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_

  
  


Ephram stood there, stoic and frozen from grief and the biting New York cold. He only half listened to what the clergyman was reciting from his old leather book. He was more intent on what lay before him. It was Claire. Claire Noel "Twiggy" Campbell. They'd been close friends since the playground days, but gradually has become less and less close as the days went by when his father had moved them to Everwood. He wondered if he hadn't moved if he still would be standing here. She was tall and thin, hence the nickname "Twiggy". Last time Ephram had seen her, her long, soft brown hair had been half-way down her back and glittered blonde in the sunlight. Claire had pale pastel blue eyes, and their color almost made it seem like the irises were clear. Next to his mother's, they were the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen. Now he would never see either again. 

  


_Remember the good times that we had?  
I let them slip away from us when things got bad  
How clearly I first saw you smilin' in the sun  
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one_  


  


A tear escaped the corner of his eye. 'Dammit...' He wiped it away but couldn't stop the silent cascade of those to follow. 'You were the one who was supposed to make it. You were the smart one. Even when I moved, you still helped me with my homework.' Ephram smiled inwardly at the thought of Claire trying to explain the concept of nuclear equations and the half-life of radioactive elements to him. It still confused the hell out of him. But, then again, she wanted a career in Radiology after school was over. She said that she 'wanted to play with radiation'.

His father's hand on his shoulder startled Ephram out of his reverie. He squeezed and Ephram sniffed back. Ephram looked at his fallen friend's casket and felt the miniature soccer ball that he had in his pocket. It was her favorite sport, and the only one she played. Her parents had begged her to play basketball, because of her height, so in the 7th grade she did. He remembered being there, rooting her on at her first game, and watching her grab her first rebound from the end she was defending, only to shoot it back up and score. God, her face had gotten so red! Claire never played again after that. 

_I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_

  
  


The clergyman called for last respects. Ephram walked up behind Claire's older brother. He didn't want to do this, he didn't want to have to say goodbye to someone he loved again. The only thing that pushed him forward was his father behind him. He shuffled his feet up to the side of her casket. She looked different...peaceful. Yes, that was it, she was finally at peace. Her hair was short now, and he wondered why she cut it. She had loved her hair. He ran his hand down her pale cheek. Ephram placed the small soccer ball by her pillow. It was black, her favorite color. He never asked why.

"See you later, Twiggy." Ephram whispered to her as he brushed his lips on her cold forehead. He sniffed again. "I'll never forget the midnight games in Central Park."

Behind him, Andy wondered what his son meant by that, and wondered again if it was right to ask. He said his goodbyes, his eyes falling on the ball his son placed in the casket. Scribbled on it in white was "Twig-46, Ephy-0". If he would have looked to the other side, he would have read highly coded message that he could never understand. 

_I'm so tired but I can't sleep  
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep  
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word  
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard_  


Ephram walked away from Claire's grave site as fast as he could. He stepped behind a tree, blocking his view from the end of the ceremony, and slid down the rough bark, chipping chunks off onto the ground beneath him and his coat. Ephram drew his knees up to his chest and buried his head into his arms. He stayed like that, trying his hardest to control his tears, until a rustle of the last of fall's leaves snatched his attention.

"It's alright Ephy." A body plumped down beside him. 

"Hey, Twiggy." Ephram mumbled.

"16 inches. Donated it to this charity that made a little kid with cancer a wig." 

"I never thought you'd ever part with your hair. You freaked out when you saw a split end."

"Yeah, well, I don't really need it." A moment of silence. 

"Why..."

"Ephram..." His day dream Twiggy sighed. "I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think...I couldn't deal. I was so tired..."

"So you swallowed the whole bottle."

"You make it sound so harsh."

"You killed yourself. How is it supposed to sound?"

Claire didn't speak. She turned her head to face Ephram. "He's trying so hard, Ephram." She leaned closer and quickly kissed him on the forehead. "Don't forget to stop and smell the roses. They might not be there for long." And she was gone with a wisp of the chilly air.

"Later." He mumbled as he felt the spot where she had kissed. Warm. He laid his head back down on his knees.

_But I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_  


"Ephram..." Andy slightly shook his son's shoulder. "They're going over to Claire's parent's to get a bite to eat, share stories. Do you want to go, or do you want to go back to your grandparents'?"

"N-no, I want to go." Ephram lifted his head. His eyes were puffy from the tears. He chuckled. "I want to hear what stories they have to tell...or rather what ones they can tell." 

"Like midnight games in Central park?" Dr. Brown smiled.

"Like the time she dressed up in a squirrel suit at Halloween and chased me down the street."

"What?" Andy raised an eyebrow. Ephram started to laugh.

"At her last away game, she soaped and T.P.-ed the bathrooms. BOTH bathrooms."

"She was pretty sneaky..." Andy said softly, calling on some of his old memories of Claire.

"...like the salt in your coffee instead of sugar?"

"I never did get her back for that."

Ephram sniffed and ran his coat sleeve across his face.

"In the summer...we'd sneak out and meet in Central Park. We'd play soccer. The last time we played it was 46 to 0. She kicked my ass."

"I'd say so."

"I don't know how she could pull off all those crazy things with her feet and not trip every time. Twiggy was the biggest klutz." Ephram smiled at the memory. The two sat there for a few more minutes before they both started to shiver from sitting on the cold ground.

Andy stood up and held out his hand to Ephram. "C'mon...they're probably waiting for you." 

_I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose_

_Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose  
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night  
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light_

Ephram looked up at his father and let him pull him up from the ground. "Remember that really ugly picture frame with the flowers all around it?"

"Didn't she give you that for Christmas?"

"Yeah...that thing was hideous. I don't know where she found it."

"And didn't you give it to your grandmother the next Christmas?"

"Yeah...and she thought it was pretty." Ephram started to laugh. The two were silent.

  


_And I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories  
  
And I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories  
Weep not for the memories_  


Disclaimer: "I will Remember You" and Everwood characters belong to whoever wrote it, meaning not me. I'm just borrowing. Twiggy is mine, however. And the squirrel suit. 


	2. Thousand Mile Wish

A Thousand Mile Wish 

  
  


___Forgive me if now I wear the face of worry  
This time alone could never cause any doubt  
But I've been cold too long  
Such a strange time to find myself coming down as the rain  
With all the holes my love,  
To fill up from the middle  
This storm could stay all night_  


He laid his head on his pillow, letting the week's tensions melt from his muscles. Ephram watched the shadows dancing on his ceiling and sighed. A string of guitar chords filled the silence, but he didn't remember turning any music on.

"Whatever happened to your purple hair?" Claire was sitting at his desk.

_'Ah...' _He thought.

"I like this song..." She answered his unspoken question that she had done it.

"I let it grow out."

"Oh." She blended with the shadows around his room. "Do you like it here?"

"It's not bad. I have a yard." After a moment Ephram turned his head to see her. "What's it like?"

"What's what like?" Claire whispered. Outside, a storm had begun. 

"Dying." Thunder and rain nearly consumed his voice.

"Kinda tingly. Like when you foot falls asleep."

"...but you didn't wake up."

"Didn't want to."

_So can you stay until we close our eyes  
Til your dreams hold mine  
Just stay until we know we tried one more time  
_

  


Lightening lit up his room, and the only shadow that remained was in the corner, with Claire. She stood up with a clap of thunder and moved closer to Ephram's bed. His room lit up again and he felt the bed sink with Claire's weight. Ephram wondered why, but Claire started to speak again.

"I don't know, either. It's your dream."

"Oh." Ephram closed his eyes. Another flash of lightening startled him into opening his eyes. At first he panicked when he noticed he wasn't in his room anymore, but in Claire's.

"Claire?" He slowly called out. Ephram turned around to face the bed that he knew was behind him. There she was. So was the empty bottle. '_Oh God...' _

_Cause laughing lovers can overcome their closest demons  
And they'll go on and they won't let go  
They saw something that they know  
Has never come so close  
Can it stay here for us, for now?_  


A door shut in the distance and a familiar voice called out a familiar name. Once. Twice, then footsteps came closer. A knock on the door and Ephram knew what he was watching. Her death. Lightening and thunder accompanied the change from Claire's room to the ER. Her tall frame was on a gurney and stains of charcoal were on her face and the thin sheet that covered her chest. Claire was awake, and staring at the swinging double doors that lead to the hallway. Her wrists were in restraints.

"They did save me." She said to him. Claire wiggled a wrist free. "Too bad one of them was a little incompetent." 

She reached over and undid the other strap. Claire hopped out of bed and came toe to toe with Ephram. She smiled darkly as she tied the flimsy hospital gown closed. He realized in this moment that Claire wasn't who he remembered; she'd changed drastically. 

_Can it stay until we know ourselves?  
I'm torn as I tell  
You're the story that I know and fell from  
I'm so far into your story I don't know why  
We think we're in control  
When we lie between the lines_  
"I told you awhile ago, in an e-mail I sent you, that things weren't the same when you left."

She was rummaging around the drawers that where closest to the gurney she had occupied mere seconds ago. The IV in her arm was starting to annoy her and in one swift moment, she ripped it from her vein and sent the IV pole flying across the room until it tipped on the cold tile.

"What are you looking for?" Ephram had remained silent for most of this. 

"This." Claire held up a gleaming piece of metal. "My last hope."

Those words echoed in Ephram's ears. Claire had gotten back up on the Gurney and brought her last hope into action. Ephram squeezed his eyes shut against the scene and impending flood of tears.

_We'll find a line to follow  
It's got to show real soon  
Or we'll never each this high  
_ "Ephram..." She called out his name. The stain of charcoal mixed with her blood made him sick. He choked it back and opened his eyes. The darkness of his room greeted him with silence. The queasiness of Ephram's stomach brought back flashes from his dream. Quickly he jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He didn't bother to turn on the light. Ephram leaned against the cold bathroom wall when his stomach was finally empty. He heard footsteps approaching and they reverberated in his head, bringing back his dream and the nausea. Ephram heaved his stomach into the porcelain bowl.

"Ephram!" The light flicked on, assaulting his eyes. His father stood in the doorway, a worried look etched on his face. Andy watched his son dry heave once more before he leaned back against the wall, trying to catch his breath. He grabbed a washcloth and ran it under cold water.

_We climb a little further  
Cause there's nothing we can't get around together  
Further gets colder until nothing was all that I saw around_  


  


"Anything left?" Andy asked as he wrung out the excess water. He kneeled down next to his oldest and wiped the sweat from his face.

"I don't think so." Ephram closed his eyes as he father put his hand to his forehead.

"You don't feel like you have a fever." His father said. "Maybe it was just something you ate. Do you still feel sick?"

"A little..." Ephram answered truthfully. He yawned. His father handed him a little pink pill and a glass of water. Images of the first scenes of his dream filtered across his vision. He wondered if Claire took that bottle of pills with water...

"Yes..." Claire said from the doorway. Ephram barely heard her as he started to nod off back to sleep.

A few minutes later Andy picked his son up carefully from the bathroom floor and carried him back to his room. 

  


_So we stay until the ground  
That we can't come down from splits us away  
Maybe stars know why we fall  
I just wish they were thinking out loud  
Oh, I could wish all night  
_  
  


Disclaimer: The song "Thousand Mile Wish" belongs to the band "Finger Eleven", not me.

  



End file.
